An (un)Eventful Day

New Year's eve was a wonderfully uneventful day. Dinner at 6 pm with C and B. Home by 8 pm. In bed by 8.45 pm. One video after another. Hoodwinked and Pirates of the Carribean. Never mind that we've seen them both. Sebi was having fun repeating every other line and humming the background music. Big Brother in his bedroom. Online, of course. Text greetings sent by 10 pm. At 12.30 am, I pulled out the P50 crossword book I picked up earlier. I've forgotten how much I liked crosswords. Today, more videos and doggy walks. Maybe a search for an open Starbucks. It's all good.

New Year's Eve 2008

Before I can blink I see arms and legs torpedoing through the air. I hear a "Yaaaaaahhhhh-Hoooooooo!" as Little Guy lands head first into the couch. Sandwhich still in hand and intact, he sits up and declares"That was cool!"

A great way to welcome the New Year I think!

Melancholia

It hangs around my home like the all too familiar unwanted houseguest.
I imagine it to be an overcast stooped figure occupying the corner seat.
I am not in the mood to entertain. If only I could launch it on one of Sebastian's
many paper airplanes.

Lucia

Christmas at my grandfather's always involved a chicken relleno and russian potato salad. All made by Lucia. She started as my uncle's nanny over fifty years ago. Eventually moving on to become the family cook. As the the years passed, she took over running the house. She was my grandfather's loyal companion. A wife and numerous lady 'friends' had come and gone in grandpa's life. Four house moves. Grandchildren born. In-laws passed. Through sickness and his eventual death on Christmas eve in 1995, she was there. Through the ups and downs (and sometimes bizarre happenings) of our lives, C and I knew that grandpa's house would always be the same. There was nothing particularly extraordinary about going to grandpa's. It was in fact, rather mundane. But it was this that made it special. There were no surprises. We knew what ice cream there was in the freezer. We knew what brand of shampoo was in the shower. We knew that if Lucia cooked roast beef today, it would taste and look exactly the same next week. Next month. Or next year. Grandpa and Lucia were the constants in our ever changing lives. Three days ago, in the early morning of December 23 Lucia had a stroke. She lies in a hospital bed unable to speak. We'll know more in the next few days. Coincidentally, we had chicken relleno (from me) and russian potato salad (from C) for our Christmas eve dinner. It wasn't the same.

Turning Green. But Not From Envy.

My sweet (and oh so creative) little boy has coloured the dog green. Yes, it's true. I am not making this up. Splashy wide streaks of green from head to tail. The effect lies somewhere between vandalism and street art. I guess it's a matter of perspective.

They were out walking the dogs when I arrived. When the door opened and I heard "I am home!" the first thing I saw was a green dog. A quick double take on my part. "Anong nangyari sa aso?" "Kinulayan po ni Seb." was the answer. As Lilia cleaned the flat, Seba kept (very) busy in his room. The dog wasn't the only thing green. Little Guy was also dressed in green with matching green streaks on his arms.

Maybe it was the unexpectedness of this whole scenario but I wasn't up for a lecture on why one should never colour the dog green. Besides, I knew M. would have this discussion with him.
The gist: He wanted to have a green dog for Christmas. He used the permanent marker from the kitchen on doggy and the whiteboard marker (from his room) on himself. Doggy would have been "all green" but his hand got tired. Yes, he agreed no more colouring the dog. Green. Or any colour for that matter.

Later that evening, as I was tucking him in: "Mommy I also know how to cut a dog's hair."

All I Want For Christmas II

We bought Sebi a playmobil summer house. I had wanted the portable carry house. M. was against it because "it's girly." "But it's a house," I said. "When did living in a house become girly?" I wasn't in the mood to go back and forth on the merits of a playmobil house. In the end, we opted for the summer home. Anyway, it's a good fit with the camper we got on our last trip to Singapore. I love playmobil. When I was a child my sister and I had the Fisher Price Little People garage. At my bito and bita's home, the nursery had the Little People Village. Sitting on the floor with little people was synonymous to hours of fun. I am serious. In fact, I loved this toy so much, when Big Brother was a teeny tot, I went out of my way to find a Little People garage (just like the one I had)!

But I digress, we were at lunch, when Sebi announced that he wants basically everything in the Playmobil catalogue (with the exception of the castle because it's *cough* *cough* "too girly." It is technically one gift as it's contained in ONE catalogue. Or so, goes the logic behind this line of thinking. "What about a Wii?" asked M. "No. I'll just get that for my birthday. It's too expensive. Besides Santa Clause doesn't do electronics." Between bites of fish sticks and chips, Sebi non-chalantly explains that "Santa is afraid of getting electricuted and isn't good with wires."

Never mind, that we are talking about the guy who employs a posse of elves and flies across the sky on a sled pulled by reindeers.

It's Mommy Magic

Sebi came in carrying a huge chocolate chip cookie. He sat in front of the computer and was getting ready to play his favorite game. "Can I have a piece of your cookie please?" A frown forms on his face and he breaks of a miniscule piece. More like a crumb really. "Can I have another one? Maybe a little bigger." It's really killing him now. The frown has gone and now it's just a look of aggravation. "Never mind" I say. He smiles and goes back to the computer. "How come it' not working but M. is using his laptop?" he cries. "It's mommy Magic. You didn't want to share your cookie so I did my mommy thing." I say as I gesture with both hands. "Is this true?" he wails to his father, who's comfortably laying in bed watching tv. "Never under estimate Mommy's powers." his father says grimly. Suddenly with floursh, he whips out another cookie (and a big smile). "Wanna share?"

Peanuts Or Cashews

The building will have a screening of The Peanuts Gang for the holidays. I asked Sebi if he would be interested. "I only eat cashews" was the poker faced reply. I just assumed he knew that the Peanuts gang referred to Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Lucy et al. Apparently, that wasn't the case.

Elvis Has Left The Building

Sebi had his end of semester program today. It was a lovely and quick program. All in all, it took an hour with performances from the first, third, and fifth grade classes. The first graders sang 'Rain, Rain Go Away' and "the mashed potato song." The fifth graders did two Elvis songs. As part of the show, they had some boys pretending to be Elvis. Sebi obviously enjoyed this part. On the way home from school, he wanted me to know, "That wasn't the real Elvis. You know, Elvis is really dead. He died a long time ago. Do you think dad knows?"

* It's time to check the i-pod for M.'s Elvis collection...Will we soon be singing "you aint nothing like a hound dog..." ? Let's see.

*sigh*

It's been a busy week. My daily list of things to do seem to be un-done. There has been a national day. A Christmas program at school. Dozens of cookies to bake and presents to send off. Not to mention, the flat hasn't been decorated for the holidays yet. (That's on my agenda for today.). I am tired.



Yesterday, I finally took the time to pull my default long gown out of the closet. It didn't fit. As in, it really didn't fit. After peeling myself out of it. I hurriedly put on my trousers. Relief, I thought. Then a little white button flew across the bathroom floor. Depressing.

Papi Does Reading Day

Today was Markku's reading day. He read Mauri Kunnas' Kolme Kokkia. This is the one where Riku, Roope ja Ringo make a huge pizza with all kinds of odd ingredients. It's one of Seba's favorite books. Markku read the book in Finnish. It was great to see Seba counting out loud (in Finnish). He was shy at first but soon warmed up. He had been looking forward to this day. Papi going to school to read to his class was a big deal. Not even a day at the golf club, or the long drive back home, and late night kept Seba from getting up early this morning.

The Plant

Yesterday Seba came home with a plant. A souveneir from last week's trip. I hadn't actually seen it till last night. Markku and I were having a late dinner when I noticed something on
the kitchen counter. It was a plant sitting on a water filled dinner plate. Next to it was a glass of water. On the other side, a lunch box with a flash light propped on it. The flash light's beam directed at the plant.

"Uhm...What's that?"

Then I found the note in Little Guy's homework envelope. A short list by Seba of the elements needed to ensure a healthy plant. (food, light, water, and air)

This answered our 'air' conversation earlier.

A New (Christmas) Tradition

I've adopted a new Christmas tradition from one of the blogs I read.

Mrs. B gifts every member of the family with a specially chosen Christmas

ornament. The beautifully wrapped ornaments are given during Thanksgiving

dinner. I loved the idea so much I decided I am starting a new tradition in my

family. Yesterday afternoon, while buying a wedding gift for a cousin, I stopped

to choose two special ornaments for my boys.

Each will get a ceramic ball that opens, with a special message inside.

There's even enough space for me to hide a little note.

Blowing Kisses

Sebi is still at that age where it's ok to show affection. We've taken to blowing kisses at each
other. As I type this, I blow a kiss to him. My imaginary kiss gently floats across the room, where he sits watching tv. He looks up and sends me a kiss in return. His little hand coming to
pursed lips, palm open he ushers his kiss in my direction.

I am relishing these sweet imaginary kisses.

Roll Call

Bedtime is a big-to-do at our home. It can never be as simple as pulling down the covers
and getting in at the designated time (8.00 pm). No. After pillows have been fluffed and duvet turned down the stuffies have to be arranged. Sebastian shares his little space with them. And
all fourteen of them have their specific place. There's nothing random over here.

Roll call please:

Slim
Fire (the first one. with no second or third name)
Fire (aka as Heat or Burn)
Water (aka as Water or Wet)
Jack TV
Macho
Pacho
Chachi
Spot
Tramp
Freeze
Jack (yes, another one)
Canine Canon
Robin (It really is Robin, Batman's sidekick. He's the only non-stuffed dog in the bunch)

P.S. Field Trip

I dropped Sebi off at school early today. His teacher Ms. Stevens came out to tell me how much Sebi enjoyed the field trip. Apparently he and Mathew were way more excited then the other already excited kids. "He could probably stay there for days" was how she described his enthusiasm for the place. I believe it. He called me from the car yesterday. He was full speed. I didn't interrupt. ("I touched a snake. A python. I touched an owl. I touched a parrot. I saw some dogs. Somebody fed the dog. Red ants bit me..."). Our dinner conversation was even more lively and included his take on the bus ride ("too long. We spied on the girls sitting in frnt of us.")

This afternoon he's coming home with a map and phone number to this park. Without a doubt, I see a trip in the not too distant horizon.

Thanksgiving

M. phoned while I was waiting for the buses to leave. He just realized that he arrived here ten years ago. I quickly piped in that we now have to celebrate Thanksgiving. Afterall, if he hadn't come here, he would never have met me and his life, would not have been as meaningful as it is now. I got a hearty laugh on the other end. A well deserved spontaneous laugh I thought.

Besides, who cares if we aren't American. A turkey dinner with all the trimmings and an excellent glass of wine, won't hurt anyone...And there's lots to be thankful for.

Field Trip

The first class field trip is today. It's amazing how quick and un-complaining the little guy can be when there's something (or somewhere) new waiting around the corner. The usual bathroom routine done in a zip. Clothes and sneakers on, in a blink of the eye. Half a tube of sunblock and half a bottle of insect repellant smeared and sprayed without a peep. I have to say, we were the epitome of efficient this morning.

We were at school on time. I waited till he and his class got on Bus No. 061.

It's going to be a fun day for him. A butterfly park and bug museum are cool places to hang out. Specially if youre the little guy who's last (6th) birthday cake was made to look bug and worm infested.

Tooth Number Two

Well tooth number two finally went (via a trip to the dentist).
Yesterday morning, I expected to see an excited little boy with Raton's little present.
Instead I found a somewhat disappointed Sebastian. Apparently, yesterday's
gift was not as impressive as the first one.

Geez!

In the lift, Sebastian got an earful on the the dire state of the economy, and the
many children losing teeth, and the over-worked rat trying to share whatever he
has with everyone. Did it fall on deaf ears? He wanted to know what the difference
was from now and the previous time. (ie. Why did I get a better package for the last
tooth?). It's a newby thing I said. You know a welcome to the 'I-Lost-My-Tooth-
For-The-First-Time' Club.

Surprisingly, the boy with an elephant's memory didn't bring up the Tooth Fairy from
Kentucky.

The Saga Of Tooth Number Two

Well tooth number two went yesterday (lower front) via another trip to the dentist.
This morning I thought I would find a thrilled little boy. Instead I
found a somewhat disappointed Sebastian telling me he wasn't too happy with the tooth
fairy's "smaller" offering. Geez!

In the lift, Sebastian hears an earful about all the other kids losing teeth and an over-worked
rat trying to share whatever he has in these hard economic times. The guy still doesn't look convinced. He asks me, what's changed between this tooth and the last one (Why was the last tooth worth more then this one?). I quickly tell him, it was a newby thing. You know, a welcome to the 'I-Lost-My-First-Tooth' Club.

Surprisingly, the boy with an elephant's memory, didn't bring up the Tooth Fairy from Kentucky.

It Sucks To Be A Cockroach

We were walking home and a small cockroach ran in front of us. Before I could say, "Step on it!", Sebastian made for the roach.

"It must be terrible to be a cockroach. You get stepped on, squished and squashed."

All I Want For Christmas: 2005

Going through Sebastian's box from pre-school, I found one of his hand written letters, from two or three years ago, with a short list of presents he wanted:

Dear Santa,

I want a Lego play set and a gay dog.

Love, Seba

I remember dropping him off at school and a very embarrassed teacher coming out of the classroom because she had to ask me something. My antennae was up. Hmmm. I was wondering what could have possibly come from the mouth of my babe. I remember her smiling, looking a little hesitant, and finally trying to explain the letter (to Santa) that I would be soon be getting in the mail. She tells me that she asked two other teachers to ask him again. Just to make sure she heard it right the first time. ("I am positive I heard him say he wants a gay dog.") I assure her that she heard right. Finally, she asks, "what's a gay dog?"

That year, Sebastian took to watching a weekly program on the lives of show dogs and their 'parents.' His favorite dog was a chihuahua named Chachi belonging to a gay couple. Sebi loved this dog and his cool clothes. To Seba, a gay dog was synonymous to a dog that came with a wardrobe as large as his. For months, all he asked for was a "gay dog." When M. and I said no, he asked everybody else who would listen. Christmas was the perfect opportunity to ask Santa.

If youre wondering, he didn't get a (gay) dog for Christmas. His cousin passed him a stuffed dog which he named Chachi. Chachi has (and still ) travels with us everywhere. But more about Chachi and the rest of the menagerie later.

Next Year's Plan

Right before falling asleep Seba tells me, "Next year when I turn seven, can you look for a really, really nice spot to build a house. Like on the same street as Marty (his best friend). Then can you find a person who knows how to make really, really good houses outside and inside...Even if it's expensive"

If he were an adult, what he'ld really be saying is: "Find me real estate in a prime location. Then find me someone who is capable of building a quality house. The interiors are just as important. Cost is not an issue."

Calling M. Did you hear this!

God Bless The Children

Just finished reading the news. The mother of a missing three year old girl is pleading 'not guilty.' She waited a month before reporting the child's dissapearance. Elsewhere, a six year old boy has been kidnapped by three men impersonating police officers. Authorities suspect it's all part of a drug ring. Almost everyday I read about a child that's been victimized in one way or another. I read it in the newspapers. Watch it on the news. And see it on the streets. It's distressing and unsettling that this type of news is becoming so commonplace. People should NOT be used to this. It's just not right.

What is happening to the people in this world???

No Title This Morning

I am procrastinating. I have an article due on Monday. I've only managed an un-cohesive two hundred words of gibberish. Last night was dreadful. After falling asleep at past mid-night, M. wakes me because he can't sleep. After thirty minutes of forgettable chatter, I convince him that he needs to give me a good fifteen minute backrub. It was the most excruciatingly painful fifteen minutes I've had in God know's how long. I don't recall whincing and the contorted expression on my face as an indication of delight. But M. was relentless in his kneading and pounding. After the longest fifteen minutes, it's Seba's turn to wake up. He can't breathe on "one side" of his nose. Twenty minutes of pillow fluffing, blanket rearrangeing, and small talk between M, Seba, and myself is followed by some cold medicine and a trip to the bathroom, where it seems, Seba has no interest in using the toilet. We sit at the edge of the tub, his head on my shoulder and my arms around him. He's quiet and relaxed. By 2.15 a.m., we are all in bed. Seba's finally sleeping soundly. I turn off the tv. The room is dark, then the snoring begins. Only four hours till my alarm clock goes off.

Bedtime Chatter

Bedtime seems to illicit the oddest and most pleasant conversations between Seba and I. This evening, he asked if we could have a "ten minute pajama party." What does one do in such a short period of time? Well "you can do whatever makes you happy."

The other night, Seba asked if it was true that it "was the happiest day for everyone" the day he was born. Sweet memories. Of course, it was I said. "But I made Mikey cry the day I was born," he says, with a look I can only describe as restrained glee. "Yes, he cried. He was my only baby for a long time." Then just as quickly, the topic changed to the posibility of a giant rubber ducky floating somewhere in the ocean.

Just Do It!

I've started an exercise regime. Three days of lifting weights and an extra day of something else to break the monotony. I passed a retro dance class the previous week. I couldn't see what was going on but I liked the music. After a week of putting it off, I decided today, to just do it. It was the best fun I've had in a long time! When Mervin, the instructor, told me it was a mix of seventies and EIGHTIES songs, I knew I was in the right place! Never mind, that I am not the most coordinated person and sometimes I feel like my body can't multi-task. This evening, I thought of a young woman whose life was recently cut short, and I was just happy to be here dancing.

Yesterday: Part IV

Received bad news. Y. has passed away on her 38th birthday. I didn't know her but I made Christmas and New Year's lunch for her. I made enough for both of us. Lentil soup. Dried apricots. Finnish crisp bread. She was a chef. She had a sister who is a journalist. A husband. Two children.

Yesterday: Part III

Peeked into Mikey's bedroom. He was sitting in bed with hundreds of coins. Counting and taping into groups of ten's. I sit on the floor, pour the remaining coins out and help him count. M. comes in and joins us. We sit, count, chat, and listen to music. I love this boy.

Yesterday: Part II

After school: the dentist's office. Sebastian has his first loose tooth. It's been hanging there for ages and M. think's it's time the dentist pulls it out. Personally I am not one to force these things but sometimes, it's easier not to argue with M. over trivial issues. Beside's Sebastian seems utterly unperturbed by all this. Tooth extraction was a success. Dr. C gives us a box in the shape of a tooth. When we get home, an excited Sebastian shows everyone, including the family pets, his little tooth.

Later that evening, he puts the little box under his pillow. He asks, if I can tell the toothfairy (or Ratoncito Perez) to bring some video games. The toothfairy (and Rat) only bring cash I say.
He wants to know why Spencer got some books and a toy? That's the toothfairy based in Kentucky I answer.

After Sebastian falls asleep, I have M. draw a picture of a rat. We fold it and put some bills inside. M. wants to know why it has to be a rat? (He grew up with the toothfairy). Because I grew up with little rat drawings made by my papi. It's one of the few memories I have. A tradition I want to pass. Daddy always draws the rat.

Yesterday: Part I

Friday. Went to school early to bring Seba's climbing shoes. Thought he would be thrilled to have me there to walk him to wall climbing. Specially after last week's debacle. I thought wrong. "What are you doing here?!" "Samuel and I are going together!" (said as he repossesses his bookbag from nanny) Samuel stands by with a slightly amused look that says, "you should know this Seba's mom!"

And together the boys walk up the steps, bookbags, lunchboxes, and homework envelopes in hand.

They grow so quickly.

tired

I didn't sleep very well last night. I am not used to the sounds Sebastian's bedroom makes when the lights are off and everyone is quiet. With every rustle from his bed, I get up to peek at him. Is the room too hot? Too cold? Is he on his tummy? On his back? On his side? What if he falls off? I need to buy a rail for the side of the bed. This is just the tip of the iceberg. My thoughts (worries) go on and on and on...It's no wonder I am exhausted.

A Small Step Towards Bedtime Independence

Sebastian got his new bed this week. Last night, he slept in his room, in his new bed, straight through the night, for the first time. As planned, I would take the trundle. But Markku had separation anxiety. In the end, Markku took the trundle and I squeezed in with Sebastian. It wasn't the most comfortable evening but the boys slept well.



In the end, it worked well. Sebastian likes his new bed. He's been in it since 6.45 pm. Let's see how the rest of the evening goes...

...In The Panic!

Sebastian's after school activity started last Friday. He chose wall climbing over my suggested violin lessons. (hmm. No surprise really.) Anyway, the instructions were to pick him at 3.30 at the elementary canteen. We did the drill days leading to the activity. "Sebi, I will pick you up at the elementary canteen after wall climbing." " Don't forget, I'll be at the canteen to pick you up." "Seba, do you remember where to go after wall climbing?" "Go straight to the canteen after wall climbing and wait for me there."...Needless to say, it was past the designated time and I was starting to get worried. I saw kids walking by with their violins, tennis rackets, kids playing chess, kids wearing tae kwon do uniforms but no sign of Mr. Sebastian. At this point, I was not feeling too confident. I was debating if I should look for him but logic told me an adult/teacher would return the children to the canteen. About fifteen to twenty minutes later, Sebastian walks in with his first grade teacher. Tears and panic on his face. It seems he forgot the instructions. After wall climbing, he and his friend Samuel went to the playground. After Samuel's mum came to get him, Sebastian panicked. He forgot my instructions. He wandered about school, fearing that we had forgotten him. Thankfully, his teacher spotted him in the hallway. When we got home I asked him if he had a plan. He said, he was looking for a guard to take him home.

PS After school, we went to Crispy Creme.

That Time of the Year

Well it's that time of the year again. Where will we be?
Will we stay here or will I be making lists, looking at schools, websites, asking advice.
I tell myself, there's no point in worrying. I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.
Besides, change is good. So I tell myself. So I tell myself.

Dreams

I dreamt of my granpa this morning. I was laying in bed. Too lazy to pull up my wellies. I could feel the bulk of my sweater and fleece jacket. I could see the pine trees and grass through the mirror's reflection. I finally got up. Facing the window, I was surprised to find the scandinavian landscape gone. In it's place was the garden in my granpa's house in Manila. I saw the papaya trees and cherry tomatoe bushes that he cultivated and the huge star apple tree in the corner. Then granpa was there. The thing was, he was standing on the roof and I was overlooking the garden from the second floor bedroom. I nearly ran out. Terrified really. But I stopped myself. This moment may never come and he was there. He looked young. His hair almost black. He had put on weight. He was wearing white bermuda shorts. He walked to the window and said, "Michelle I missed you. I have always missed you." Two nights ago, I prayed for an ally for Francesca and myself. Granpa answered my prayer. Somebody hears me.

In the twelve years that my granpa has passed away. I have dreamt of him only once before.
This was about three or four years ago. He brought my bito into this dream. Ammends were made. I need not say more.

Time To Get Ready

School will be opening in two weeks. We've done the rounds of doctors and checks. Tuition paid. Lunch for the term arranged. School uniforms have been purchased. All that's left is to enjoy the remaining weeks and get a haircut. That goes for both Seba and myself.

I am Just Not Into You.

We arrived at Arja's home after a long drive. Seba was playing in Mikey's bedroom
(ie. Arja's guest bedroom). Markku asked him if he wanted to share the room with
his big brother. The very nonchalant answer: "Nah. We're just not into each other."

Panties...er Pansy!

We were painting Sebi's little chairs and table in the garden. (He chose the colours green for his table, red for one chair, and gold for his chair). Mikey and I were chatting. Can't rmember the specifics. In passing I said something like, " Youre nothing but a big pansy!" To which, Little Brother added, "Yeah Mikey, youre just a big panty!"

Project 2: The Sandbox

Our neighbor created a fabulous sandbox using old discarded telephone posts that were left on the road side. Needless to say, Seba's box was looking a little sad compared to this one. With some help from the same neighbor, Markku took the remaining posts. Soon, Seba will have himself a bigger and better sandbox. We've already picked a spot to accomodate the new box. It'll be situated slightly behind the current one. Closer to the 'forest.' What will happen the current sandbox? I am looking forward to a (new) boxed flowerbed.

I Love You's

At the summer house. Sebastian is walking up the steps to the second floor.

Michelle: "I love you."

Sebi: "I love you bigger then the sky."

Michelle: "I love you bigger then the universe."

Sebi: "I love you bigger then everything after the universe."

The Last Day of School

It's the last day of school for Sebastian. I have some mixed feelings. A little bit of sadness, happiness, and relief. I remember Sebastian's first day. I was anxious. We were coming to a large school a month late. When we did the rounds of 'big schools', Seba knew where he wanted to go. It was a toss up between his big brother's school and where most of his friends were...I remember when we drove through the school gates for the first time he said, "You can drop me here. Just come back in the afternoon." We watched him in the play yard. He looked so scared and alone. The play yard can be daunting when you are new. For the next couple of months we made it a point to come in after the bell rang. Just until he made friends and felt comfortable. Speaking of which, he has made friends. He has "best friends." It's wonderful to see. He is such a social child...Today is the last day of school. I never thought it would come so quickly. I certainly didn't think that, as I watched him from the sidelines on that first day. My sweet little Seba can read now. He doesn't write very well. But that's alright. It will come. Last night, I asked him how it feels that the year has come to a close. "I was really afraid on the first day." was the very solemn reply...As I waited for the car, on this last day, I watched Seba climb the jungle bars, run after his friends, play in the sandbox. In the distance, the school buses were honking their horns in unison. A last day of school tradition? I don't know. It's a lovely sunny day. It's summer!

"Smoked Pirahna Please."

Sebastian loves the seafood section of the supermarket. He spends a good deal of time just looking at the assorted fish, eels, shrimps, and crabs. The one rule we have: No Touching. Apparently, this didn't apply to the live shrimp. So you can imagine my shock at seeing both hands inside the tank. After expalining that the 'No Touch' rule extends to the tanks, he asked if we could buy smoked fish. We asked the fish monger what they had. After some thought, Sebastian politely asked, "Excuse me, do you have pirahna?"

Pre-Mother's Day

Early Saturday morning. I was laying in bed waiting for Sebastian to wake. There was no hurry. It was my day to sleep in. Sebastian finally woke and quickly sat up.

"You can't get out of bed. Stay here."
"Uhm, why?"
"Isn't this the day that daddy and I make a mess in the kitchen?"
"No. That's tomorrow. It's only Saturday."
"Are you sure?"
"Positive. Daddy's not even here. He's at a golf tournament."
"Ok. You can go back to bed."

Choices

We were on our way to school. Sebastian was playing some kind of Sims game on his Nintendo DS. He happily announced that he had enought money to buy either a house or a dog. He asked what I would choose. My answer was quick. "I would buy a house." He thought about it briefly and decided on a dog. "I need someone to talk to."

Off Kilter

It's funny how a little lump on the side of Seba's neck has sent me into a tailspin. I discovered it last night while bathing him. This morning we rushed to see his doctor. Dr. C say's it's not so un-common in growing children. Adenoids and stuff like that. ("Does he sweat alot? Scatch his head often? Get an infection?") This was all lost on me. I just know it shouldn't be there. So this afternoon, despite fairly re-assuring words from the doctor, I watched over my rambunctious six year old as if he were a toddler once again. He get's more attention then usual. A trip to the arcade and toystore were part of the afternoon's agenda. This evening I indulge him, by letting him have dessert before dinner. At the end of dinner, his nanny lovingly carries him off the kitchen stool even though he normally jumps off...

Words to Love. Names to See.

There's just something about the words 'Kota Kinabalu.' I love the way the letters roll of my tongue..."Ko Tah Kee Nah Bah Loo." It's just fun to say. If syllables were like pictures, I imagine little blocks of syllables gently being tossed across the floor and landing in this magical arrangement of 'Ko Ta Ki Na Ba Lu.'...Another set of words to enjoy - 'Machu Picchu.' Just say it with me: "Maaah Chooo Peee Chuuu." I love, love, love it! I imagine an endlessly long colourful knitted scarf...I wonder what other words are out there for me to say, imagine, and see.

Oh Sh**!

I was working on the computer. Sebastian was playing with his little cars.
I could hear bits and pieces of the pretend conversation...

Sebastian (as car no. 1 talking to car no. 2): "I've had a shit day...."
Me (no longer paying attention to my mail): "What did you say?"
Sebastian (trying not to look guilty): "Uhm. I don't know."
Me: "It was an 's' 'h' word."
Sebastian (looking very smug now): "Oh. You mean 'shark?'
Me (giving him the not-too-pleased look): "hmmm"

To Be...Or Not To Be

At home. In the kitchen. Singing one of our fave song's The Killers' 'Somebody Told me.' All agreed it's a cool song. So it goes, I asked Sebastian, if I was cool. I never expected this answer.

"To be cool, you need to learn the language of coolness. It's all about purpose."

Perspective

So there I was at Starbucks having my usual non-fat cappuccino and whole wheat bagel for breakfast, when this terrible snorting sound came out of nowhere. It sound like my pug but twice as loud. It was the guy at the table in front of me. Ignoring it was hard. It was irritating, gross, disturbing, and distracting. Then it hit me. Why is this poor guy annoying me? Maybe I should have some empathy. After all, I can't imagine anyone wanting to make those sounds. Besides there could be something seriously wrong. It's too early to be judgemental....Which leads me to something truly serious and heartbreaking. I read about a family that discovered their 16 month old daughter had a cancerous tumor. All this while on holiday. They have relocated to be able to provide the best medical treatment her. In the process, they have left their jobs (as school teachers), home, and support sysytem. Everything is trivial when faced with this.

Nat Geo Adventure

"National Geographic Adventure is scary. It's about getting lost. Your new friends are strangers."

It's Nature

Sebastian had a very simple of canned tuna in lemon butter with rice this evening.
He told his papi, "I am eating dead tune. It's nature!" (Yeah dad. It's nature!)

Maundy Thursday

I've spent most of the day in bed with my laptop and a large bag of Holy Kettle Corn, watching the marathon run of 7th Heaven. Who doesn't love the Camden family? I wish I lived on their street....When the pop corn ran out I did make a quick run to 7-11 for ice cream. So it was 7th Heaven and a box of ice cream sandwiches. Now that the marathon has ended, it's time to listen to Paolo Nutini. Darn. No more ice cream.

Some Noteworthy Reading

Bedtime stories have become a favorite way to end the day. We've gone from creating our own stories (The Adventures of Sweet Pea) to reading books about sharks, dinosaurs, and insects (still a favorite) to story books. Sebastian's current favorites are:



The Blue Day Book by Bradley Trevor Greive - I bought this book a couple of years ago. I loved the photographs and captions. It really is a charming little book. Sebastian discovered this on the shelf sometime last year. It has since become a favorite. He memorizes the lines and likes to say them out loud as I read. Then we talk about the cool animal pictures and which one's we like the best. It's great that he can relate to this book. Even small people have 'blue days.'



It's Hard To Be Five by Jamie Lee Curtis and Laura Cornell - Sebastian discovered this book in school. We read this every Wednesday at our reading morning's. Seba has just turned 6, started at 'big' school, and has recently given up his stroller so he can totally relate to this. He loves the pug and the "annoying baby brother." The illustrations are fun too. There's so much too see and talk about on each page.



Diary Of A Fly/ Diary Of A Spider/ Diary Of A Worm by Doreen Cronin - We first discovered Diary of a Worm at our reading morning's. We can read this book three times in a row and Seba still finds it just as fun as the first time. Since it has become a favorite, I picked up the other two diaries for him. This is one book where short sentences pack a lot of punch! Specially when you read it the way you imagine a small person would say it. The pictures are large and fun. Seba loves that Worm would like to be secret service agent when he grows up and Fly would like to be a super hero. Grampa Spider is a great character too. Seba's only wish: Diary of a Cockroach!



Two recent buys that are equally noteworthy:



Beware of the Storybook Wolves by Lauren Child - I love stories and characters that are off-beat and veer away from the expected. This book has all of that and more. Where else will you find a Fairy Godmother who is grumpy and tired of doing favors for spoilt princesses?! Or a little wolf who loves wearing a ballgown?! The bold illustrations just add to the charm of this book. Seba has not taken to this book as he did the others but I really like it.



The Boy, The Bear, The Baron, The Bard by Gregory Rogers - This book has no text. It's similar to a comic book wherein you follow boxes of pictures. I think this is a great way to 'create and imagine' a story. Last night, we 'read' this one. I noticed that Sebastian also takes cues from the more subtle images. (Expressions and stance of the characters). Really a great way to build your imagination. Plus the story always changes with each reading.

When The Feathers Fly

January is a major cleanng month for me. Normally, the entire flat gets done in a week. But I've been feeling under the weather and a super-clean house has not been at the top of my list. To get into the groove, I've called the carpet/ upholstery cleaners to come in and do there thing. The sofa in the living room was the priority. God knows it needs a good cleaning. It has literally become Sebastian's stomping ground and Daisy's bed. So the carpet guys are here and I tell them and the girls, "please take the covers off and wash ONLY the covers. Do NOT wet the feathers (down) cushions. This can NOT get wet." After repeating myself maybe fifty times in a span of twenty minutes in both English and Tagalog, I decided to turn on my laptop. Three minutes later, the down cushions are soaking WET! My face is visibly dismayed. Carpet Man No 1 tells me, we'll vacuum it dry. Now my living room is filled with wet and dry down. Some stick to my face and hair. I decide it's time for me to retreat. Screaming isn't going to do anything. Nor is thinking about the duck that gave its down for my once fluffy sofa. I'll just think violent thoughts in my bedroom.

I've Forgotten How To Flirt!

I've forgotten how to flirt. I was at the shoe store buying a sexy pair of heels. Two babes next to me (and I don't mean the kind in a stroller). In the old days, I would have smiled. Looked coy. Even said something. Now it's just quick glances. Hmmm...What happened to me???!!!

Post Script to 'Can I Live With This?'

The answer is NO. I re-took my pictures. Still not the greatest but at least I don't blend into the woodwork. I am still using my current passport. I've been to Macau and Singapore since. A single page left for stamps and the like.

Mental Note to Self: Do passport this month!!!

It's A House Thing

We were enjoying Sunday lunch at Mamou when Sebastian asked if he could have "more brothers and sisters" that he could "boss around." Not a surprise since his favorite movie is the new version of "Your's, Mine, and Ours." Anyway, my answer was a quick "Nope." He put down his fish stick and with a serious look said, "It's a house thing isn't it? You mean only if we live in a house."

The "Only if we live in a house" line has been the ready answer to why we can't have another pet!